What the Rev. Phil Schotzko did in front of those teens is remindful of an old joke:
Farmer walks up to his stubborn old mule and, before issuing a command, whacks him in the head with a two-by-four.
“What’d you do that for?” says a stunned onlooker.
“First,” the farmer says, “you have to get his attention.”
Schotzko, of the Catholic Church of St. Peter in St. Peter, was the speaker at this year’s baccalaureate ceremonies for St. Peter High grads.
Kudos to him for taking that tired genre — the high school graduation speech — and standing it on its head. Literally.
He prefaced his talk by telling the students, “I know I have to get your attention, so ...”
So he did what he did.
In retrospect, he said he doesn’t know if he should have done it, and doesn’t know if he’d ever do it again.
When he spoke at the school’s baccalaureate several years ago — St. Peter pastors take turns speaking at the event — he said he played it straight, more or less sticking to a traditional plateful-of-platitudes theme.
But this time around he took the mule-whacking route. Which is to say, he performed a headstand at the altar in Christ Chapel at Gustavus Adolphus College as berobed grads and their kin looked on.
And as an exclamation point, his shoeless feet were clad in striped clown socks.
Schotzko said that sort of behavior comes naturally to him. For St. Peter’s annual Fourth of July parade, he dons goofy garb and joins the ranks of marchers.
“I’m a clown even when it doesn’t show.”
But he said there was a method to his baccalaureate madness: He was trying to convey the message that it’s good and proper to “be the fool.” Even if it means not being cool, as Christian values are sometimes perceived.
Upon righting himself from his headstand, he proceeded with his gist — that the grads should go out of their way to befriend those who don’t have many friends, to take stands against hurtful pranks and to rail against demeaning language leveled at genders and races.
In short, to do the right things even when those right things aren’t cool.
Schotzko doesn’t know how well his message sank in with the teens, though some parents told him it was appreciated.
He prefers to shun any publicity about the approach he took, and hopes he didn’t overstep the bounds of propriety in delivering a conventional message preceded by buffoonery.
But then he said something that absolves him completely.
“I can’t recall my own graduation, or who spoke at it,” said the 1968 high school graduate.
Who can? And that’s the point.
Clown on, Father Schotzko. Your medium is the message.
Brian Ojanpa is a Free Press staff writer. Call him at 344-6316 or e-mail bojanpa@mankatofreepress.com.
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