Brian Ojanpa
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Lurching man's chair doesn't a La-Z-Boy make
With all the marginal items on eBay that people bid top dollar for, you’d think it would be easy to sell a motorized recliner driven by a drunk who gained national attention.
Turns out it is, and isn’t. Which is what happens when you use a brand name carelessly.
Earlier this week the police department of Proctor, near Duluth, was hours away from ending its five-day eBay auction on the chair when the La-Z-Boy people came calling.
It seems Police Chief Walter Wobig had innocently described the recliner as a La-Z-Boy on eBay. In American lexicon, La-Z-Boy has become a generically synonymous word for any recliner chair.
But like Kleenex, Dumpster and Laundromat, it is a brand name, and corporate trademark attorneys are zealous about protecting them from unauthorized use. And misuse.
Journalists have long known that if they want to get a letter from lawyer pronto, all they need do is write kleenex — lower case — in an article.
Chief Wobig, who was getting excited about an impending large payday, was deflated after hearing from La-Z-Boy.
The top bid for that headlighted, cupholdered, stereo-equipped motorized drunkmobile was $43,500 when it was yanked off eBay. The 2,800-population town could have used that kind of dough.
(That people can be so blithely rich as to pay that much for a chair powered by a lawn mower engine is a topic for another day.)
Wobig, duly educated on the basics of trademark infringement, had to re-list the chair on the Web site and start the bid process all over again.
The second go-round didn’t fare as well, with the winning bid topping out at $10,999, representing a $30,000-plus “loss” to the city.
All this arose because one Dennis Anderson decided to go a-drinkin’ on a summer day, got behind the “wheel” of his chair and crashed into a parked car.
The police put the chair up for auction after Anderson pleaded guilty Oct. 20 to drunken driving.
Wobig said the chair has transmission issues — it balks getting into gear — but otherwise appears to be a fine conveyance for those who enjoy ambulatory furniture capable of going bump in the night.
Actually, he just wants to get this circus over with — and get some people off his back. He said some folks have taken him to task for taking the man’s chair away.
Meantime, Anderson is sitting pretty, more or less.
An autographed photo of him lazing in his chair fetched $710 on eBay. His kin said it will be used to help pay his fines and legal fees.
Brian Ojanpa is a Free Press staff writer. Call him at 344-6316 or e-mail bojanpa@mankatofreepress.com .
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