The Free Press, Mankato, MN

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  • John Cross

    Culture educator

May 10, 2006

Educator examines raising children in a new place

By Nick Hanson

MANKATO — Imagine yelling at a stranger’s child for misbehaving.

Or being called an “old man” or “old woman” and considering it a compliment.

How about getting mad at a child for making eye contact with an adult.

Perhaps those ideas seem strange in America, but they’re common cultural practice in Africa.

For the increasing African immigrant and refugee population in Mankato, ditching those cultural practices is just as tough as local citizens attempting to adjust to them.

Tanzania native and St. Olaf Professor Joseph Mbele addressed that cultural rift Tuesday at the Lincoln Community Center.

He also discussed challenges parents face trying to raise their children in a completely different atmosphere than Africa.

About 100 people, mostly African, showed up for the presentation and question and answer session.

“When you grow up as part of a culture, we take that culture as normal,” Mbele said. “The danger is that when we go to another country, we carry the idea that my culture is the norm.”

Not true, he said. But culture shock can be frustrating.

Still, Mbele said the best approach is an open mind.

“Before we judge it’s better to try and understand,” he said.

As far as unwanted cultural influence and the potential loss of cultural identity among African children, Mbele suggested immigrant parents take a flexible approach.

“As long as they’re not breaking the law, I’m happy.”

And African parents should expect their teens to rebel and feel frustrated at times.

“Teenagers are trouble all over the world,” he said. “We can’t assume that what we see in American kids is approved by their parents.”

Mankato adult education teacher Clarice Esslinger said she’s witnessed the difficult struggle immigrants often endure, especially when raising children.

“Any parent is concerned about their children wherever they are,” she said. “It’s compounded when you go to a different country.”

Mankato resident Halima Mumin moved to the United States 10 years ago. She has five children. In the future she hopes to network with area parents in an attempt to learn more about the culture and acceptable behavior.

“My concern is about the teenage kids,” she said. “I got some good advice (from Mbele).”

But even after 10 years of living in the area, adapting to life in America is still difficult, she said.

“It’s very, very tough to adjust,” Mumin said. “Even right now it’s still tough.”

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