By Mark Fischenich
MANKATO — For about an hour, they looked like a typical group of adolescents at an adult-organized event on a Saturday morning.
Maybe a little bit sleepy, not particularly talkative, willing to ask a question only when pressed to come up with one.
The eight kids were children of men and women serving in the military, mostly serving in Iraq. They’d been brought to Minnesota State University for the day to let them know they weren’t alone, to help them express their fears and frustrations, and — for 90 minutes in the morning — to ask questions of a pair of guys who had been in Iraq.
So they asked about the sand, about what soldiers do with their free time, if they’d personally come under attack, if Iraq has a lot of snakes. Sgt. Ben Schlag, an MSU student who returned from his deployment a year ago, and retired Staff Sgt. Steve Robbins of Mapleton, who served in Iraq in 2004 and 2005, answered them all.
But the typical group of adolescents changed when Schlag started asking questions back. Like when he asked what the hardest thing was of having a father or mother serving in Iraq.
As the answers came, so did the sniffles and some tears and a bit of undisguised anger.
“The hardest thing is I thought he was going to come back in a couple of months,” said Nick Seibring, whose stepfather is a National Guard soldier serving with the 1st Brigade Combat Team. “Now it’s going to be September.”
President Bush’s decision to boost the number of American troops in Iraq, particularly in Baghdad, prompted the six-month extension.
“I think it’s stupid,” one youngster said. “I wish Bush would just die.”
Tony Spurling, a boy Schlag had been teasing because of his unwillingness to ask any questions, started to offer his opinion of the extension.
“It’s dumb,” Spurling said. “It’s ... Oh, never mind.”
One of the adult organizers of Saturday’s event asked Spurling if he wanted to share the word he used during a smaller group discussion to describe his feelings.
“Rage,” he said.
Robbins, the retired soldier from Mapleton, didn’t try to dissuade the kids from feeling what they’re feeling.
“I don’t think anything anyone can say can take away the pain the extension is causing,” Robbins said. “Only time can take that away.”
Saturday’s event was aimed at maybe relieving it a bit, easing it with some listening and talking. Sponsored by the Minnesota National Guard, 4-H, the U.S. Army Reserve and the Minnesota Child Care Resource and Referral Network, the Speak Out for Military Kids was the second held in the state this winter.
“The idea behind it is to just give the kids a voice,” said Amber Runke, a program specialist for Operation: Military Kids and a 4-H events coordinator. “They can also interact with other kids who are going through the same things. You hear kids say, ‘I’m the only one in my school. No one else understands.’”
There are 12,000 kids in Minnesota with a parent in the National Guard, said Gail Mossman, the Guard’s youth coordinator. There are 3,700 kids with a parent in the 1st Brigade Combat Team. Thousands of others have a brother, sister, uncle or aunt serving in Iraq.
The Speak Out events — others are planned for Lanesboro in February and Duluth in March — bring the kids together and guide them through a day of figuring out how they feel about what’s going on in their lives and how to express it. In the evening, the kids give lectures, present skits or show videos they made that day about what it’s like to have a parent overseas.
Robbins’ daughter Angela, 17, went through the program. She’s since done her speech for other groups and was there Saturday, talking to the first-timers. Steve Robbins said it’s helped his daughter develop connections with similar teenagers and to talk about what she went through.
“I think this program is just — I don’t know what word to use,” he said. “There’s no word strong enough.”
Robbins said it’s important to remember the enormous sacrifices being made by American soldiers.
“But these kids are the heroes,” he said. “It’s an awesome thing to give up your parents.”
Schlag said he didn’t hesitate to surrender a Saturday when asked to hang out with 12-to-17-year-old kids of soldiers. He was basically taking his own advice on the best way to support the troops.
“First of all, help the families here,” he said.
That includes listening to their kids when they need someone to talk to, according to Schlag, who manned a gun on an M-1 tank in downtown Baghdad. He said his sense of service didn’t end when he was sent home at the end of his deployment.
If the Speak Out people ask again, he’ll try to be there.
“I feel I have a responsibility to help,” he said.
Organizations that would like to schedule a repeat performance of some of the presentations developed by the kids at Saturday’s Speak Out can call Amber Runke at (612) 624-8198 or e-mail her at runk0014@umn.edu. Runke is also the contact person for any children of deployed soldiers who would like to participate in future Speak Outs.
